At various stages of a woman’s life the question of cosmetic surgery rears its head.  For a long time now I’ve been on the fence as to whether or not that’s a smart choice.

As a young woman I took pride in the fact that I did not judge my elder “sisters” – the ones who decided that cosmetic surgery was necessary in order for them to feel good about themselves.  There but for the grace of god, I thought.  My day would come and who knew how I would handle it?  Would I be able to look in the mirror and feel satisfied at what I saw – or would the temptation to look better prove too great?  And for that matter would I be able to afford to have anything done even if I really felt it was necessary?

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It’s not as sexy as it sounds.  Let’s take one more trip back to sleepless nights – since I had one last night.  And yes, that’s after I told you all about my natural sleep aids and how well they work – they’re good but they’re not infallible. 

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I may not be a fashionista, but I am definitely a fashionREALista! 

It all hit me this morning while I was going through the daily ritual of dressing myself for the office.  Now, I am in a business which allows more latitude than many – but it’s also a very young business and that can be a challenge for a menopausal woman.

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Sleep Problems. Oh yeah, that’s another menopausal symptom. When you read about menopause you invariably read about the sleeping problems that go with the territory.

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I’ve noticed in perusing various sites frequented by the “menopausal set” that issues about dressing are uppermost on everyone’s mind.  The majority of us want to dress hip and chic without trying to look as though we think we’re still 20 something.  After all – so many of us are still in the workplace – unlike generations of menopausal women who came before us.  The rest of us just want to be comfortable without looking like something that slept in a dumpster.  Is that too much to ask?

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There are many of you who are proud to announce that you have “never had a symptom and found menopause to be a breeze”.  That’s true.  I hear it occasionally.  To add insult to injury most of you have never experienced an ounce of weight gain during your menopausal episode – and that’s when I really start to get cranky.  But to be fair you should feel good about escaping from the horrors that are visited on the many.

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The majority of what you read about menopause addresses various related complaints and ways in which to mitigate them. It can be pretty disheartening. Others typically view you with anything from sympathy to revulsion (those damn young people can be brutal and they don’t even realize it half the time – sure their day will come – but we’ll be dead so what good will it do us?). Given those circumstances all of my urgings to reposition menopause as something positive versus its current capacity as the last station stop before death should fall on deaf ears – right? I mean what could be positive about a resounding confirmation of old age? But is that really what menopause is about – or should be about? Did nature provide us with a major stage in our lives only to serve as a reminder of imminent death? Doubtful.

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Let me start by saying “Be careful!”  When you wake up on that minus 5 degree day your temptation will be to pull on the long johns and break out the heavy socks and boots.  And trust me – if you do you’ll likely live to regret it.  Hell, I can’t even wear a suit jacket in the office on some of the coldest days of the year.  My best advice to you is “never forget the menopausal furnace when dressing”.

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I have been neglecting one of the critical and possibly most embarrassing symptoms of menopause – Hallmark Tears.  Jackie, author of the new breast cancer support and information blog www.secondbasedispatch.blogspot.com, reminded me of my omission when she recently shared this comment:

“I don’t mind sharing this and Robin, I’m hoping you may want to blog about it. I’ve noticed that heading into menopause reminds me a lot of 8th grade–it’s almost like the hormones are gathering up for a last hurrah before they leave. I feel as emotional exiting the reproductive years as I felt entering them. I can’t stand to watch those ASPCA commercials with Sarah McLaughlin and don’t even get me started on Marley and Me. Has anyone else noticed that?”

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On average menopause starts at age 52 and goes until age 54.  And that can vary a great deal – starting much earlier and lasting for as long as ten years – it’s really anyone’s guess.  I will never know when menopause would have started for me because I went into surgical menopause at the age of 48.  About a year ago I asked my doctor if I was past menopause.  He said there was no sure way to tell because I supplement hormones so some of the changes that would be expected won’t occur unless I stop supplementing them.  And I’m not about to do that.

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